Leftovers for all!

Today was the last “full day’ meeting, and I’m very glad to be done!  Those things are exhausting.

For breakfast, I had a 1/4c dry oats with 1/2 scoop chocolate protein powder, as well as a big bowl of fruit (a few pineapples, lots of watermelon and strawberries).

Lunch certainly didn’t agree with me today; I think there must’ve been hidden dairy in the wrap or sauce.  I had a steak wrap from Roti, a popular Mediterranean place in DC, and while it was delicious (and I should’ve eaten the Amy’s Pita Chips later), it didn’t sit right and my stomach was sick all the way until about 7pm.

At 7pm, when finally a rumble of the tummy came, I sprang to my past few-days leftovers!

This plate is a baby-sized plate, and I had two servings.  I finished off the Bertucci’s risotto that I brought home last night and also the roasted butternut squash from two nights ago.  I topped the squash with cayenne pepper and a bit of honey.

I whipped some sugar-free pistachio Jello pudding (sounds crazy, but is delicious), which I got hooked on many years ago when my family was searching for desserts that my dad, who is diabetic, could eat.  Also, note to readers who are also lactose intolerant: the lactose activates some of the pudding, so if you’re making it with almond or soy milk, as I do, only use about 3/4 of the specified liquid amount.

I also went to physiotherapy for my hip tonight, and MAN, my glutes hurt from the exercises and I got the most painful (though necessary) deep-tissue massage to loosen up my scar tissue and tight upper quad muscles.  OUCH.

Bad Self-Talk and Regret

I don’t have the best willpower.  To be honest, it’s probably pretty abysmal.  Sometimes, I “overeat” to the point of sickness – and I’m sad to say this happens at least once a week.

However, the worse is the day after, or even hours after.  The self-talk that begins in my head from the moment I realize I’ve overeaten too much is much worse than the feeling itself.

I start thinking things like, “how can I work this off?  How long do I need to go on the arc trainer for?  How little can I eat tomorrow?  Maybe I should just give up carbohydrates for a week.  I wonder if this fat burning supplement is on sale.  Should I just eat more in an attempt to forget that it happened?  I mean, I went off the deep end already, might as well keep going…”

I kid you not.  I think these things, at least once a day, if not more.  I get anxious thinking about eating out, even with friends, and making a poor choice or overeating.  I get anxious when I start to get hungry because I fear the onset of these judgments/thoughts.  It’s a constant struggle for equilibrium that I’ve had for many, many years.

if only I could be this calm in my head on this topic..

So, my question is for you, readers –

Have you any of you shared these thoughts?  What did you do about them?